Hi
Respecter ses parents
I. INTRODUCTION
In America there are many special days set aside to honor and appreciate special people. Some of these are: Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, Grandfather’s Day, Grandmother’s Day, Memorial Day, Labor Day, etc. We do realize the significance of these occasions and we recognize the ideas, ideals, and philosophies of such days. We appreciate the efforts of those who initiated these occasions for the recognition and appreciation of special people.
As for the appreciation of parents, we admire the efforts of children who remember their parents on such occasions by sending them greeting cards and gifts. However, we hope that the appreciation is not for one single day in a year, but for every day throughout the year.
II. PARENTS IN THE QUR’AN
A Muslim child should respect and appreciate his or her parents every day throughout the year. Allah commanded human beings to honor their parents after honoring Allah Himself. Throughout the Qur’an, we notice that parents are mentioned with appreciation and respect, even if they are senile. In Surah Al-Isra’ (Children of Israel), there is a very beautiful description of how parents are to be treated. Allah (swt) says:
Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to your parents. If one of them or both of them reach old age with you, do not say to them "Fie" and do not repel them, but address them with kind words. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy, and say: "My Lord, have mercy upon them, as they brought me up when I was young." [7:23-24]
The recognition and respect of parents is mentioned in the Qur’an eleven times; in every instance, Allah reminds children to recognize and to appreciate the care and love they have received from their parents. In one aspect, Allah demands that children recognize their parents by saying to them:
"We have enjoined upon man kindness to his parents." [9:8/46:15]
- La demande de reconnaissance envers les parents est rendue plus emphatique lorsque Allah dit dans le Coran, sourate Al-Baqara (La Vache), ce qui suit :
« Et (souviens-toi) quand Nous avons conclu un pacte avec les enfants d'Israël, (en disant) : n'adorez personne en dehors d'Allah (Seul), et soyez bons envers vos parents… » [5:83]
- In Surah Al-Nisaa’ (The Women), Allah (swt) again emphasized that children should be kind to their parents.
“And worship Allah. Do not associate anything with Him. [Show] kindness to your parents…” [4:36]
- In Surah Al-An'am (The Cattle), Allah (swt) re-emphasized that people should be kind to their parents.
“Say: Come, I will recite to you what your Lord has prescribed for you: that you associate nothing with Him, and that you do good to your parents…” [4:151]
III. MOTHERS
Although Islam recognizes both parents, mothers are accorded particular gratitude and respect. This attitude of Islam is understood when we realize the hardships and suffering that mothers experience in their lives. In this regard, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said:
It was narrated by Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) that a man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and asked him, “Who should I be close to in friendship?” The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) replied:
Your mother, your mother, your mother, then your father, then the one closest to your kinship, and the one after.
Islam has endorsed respect for parents by their children even if the parents are non-Muslims. If parents strive very hard to convert their children to non-Islamic beliefs, they don’t follow them, but they are to be good to them. In this regard, Allah (swt) says in Surah Luqman:
And We have enjoined upon man concerning his parents—his mother bears him in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years—Give thanks to Me and to your parents. To Me is the journeying. But if they strive with you to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, then do not obey them. Consort with them in the world kindly, and follow the path of those who turn back to Me. Then to Me is your return, and I will inform you of what you used to do.
IV. MORE RESPECT
Islam teaches us that respect for parents comes immediately after praying to Allah and before Jihad (struggle and striving in the way of Allah). In this regard, the Prophet (pbuh) said the following:
Narrated by Abi Abder Rahman Abdullah bin Massoud (May Allah be pleased with him) saying: I asked the Prophet (pbuh), “Which deed is most beloved to Allah?” He replied, “Prayers on time.” Then I asked, “Which one is next?” He said, “Goodness to parents.” Then I asked, “Then which one is next?” He said, “Jihad in the way of Allah.” (Agreed)
In Islam, respect for parents is so great that the child and his wealth are considered to be the property of the parents. In this regard, the Prophet (pbuh) said:
Narrated by Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) that a man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) to settle a dispute with his father over a loan he had given to his father. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to the man, “You and your wealth belong to your father.”
V. FINAL REMARKS
We hope and we pray that all of us will respect our parents while they are alive and even after they are dead. You may honor your parents after they died through the following methods:
Make daily supplications for them
Make a donation to a charity on their behalf
Establish a perpetual charity on their behalf—such as a mosque, an Islamic center, an Islamic library, an Islamic hospital, an orphanage, a senior citizens’ home, etc.
Perform Hajj on their behalf or ask someone to do so.
Read the Qur’an on their behalf
Distribute Islamic Literature on their behalf
May Allah grant us the ability to do our best to honor our parents, to be kind to them, to assist them, and to please them for the sake of Allah.
O Allah! Accept our humble prayers and make us obedient servants to you.
O Allah! Help us to be respectful children to our parents. Ameen.
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